When to take a child out of school.

The government’s wish to punish parents, for taking children out of school in term time, is being challenged. The two weathermen explored the issue.

Weatherman 2: That chat about the lottery got me thinking and we are all jetting off just after half term when it’s cheaper to holiday.

 Weatherman 1: You will get prosecuted – the fine is £60 per child and since you have two that’s £120 you’ll lose.

WM2:  Yes, but I saved £400 on the holiday, so who is laughing now?

WM1: The Department for Education want all children to be in school for lessons.

WM2 :  Well if they advocated children skive off, they’d be out of a job - so they are going to toe that line aren’t they?

WM1: They maintain that missing even a week off school can seriously damage your child’s chances of getting on in life. Poorer exams and academically disadvantaged. There’s a real stigma to it.

WM2 :  And what if I take my child to China and we spend some of the time learning about Chinese culture and cooking, and maybe a bit of the language – how damaging is that to my child’s future prospects? The DfE are paranoid.

WM1 : But it’s black and white law.

WM2 :  Actually it’s grey. A bunch of magistrates threw a case out last week in the Isle of Wight. The father maintained his child’s 94% attendance record satisfied the criteria of being a “regular attendee” and he was therefore justified to take her to Disney in Florida.

WM1 : They don’t do GCSEs in Mickey Mouse. That’s not academic.

WM2 : It could be – just think of the Sorcerer’s Apprentice when he puts on a wizard’s hat, he gets a broom to do all the cleaning and the broom causes a flood. Man’s tendency to lose control of inanimate things and the debateable wisdom of us trying to exert control in all spheres is a key philosophical issue of our day.

WM1 : Good music.

WM2 : There you go – skive off and listen to Paul Dukas. The DfE are being jobs-worths.

WM1 : There was another film where Mickey and Pluto get chased by a seagull. That’s been a hot topic this summer. That could feed back into the classroom: man v the gull.

WM2 :  When you start to think about it – being out of school is far more interesting than being in it. My teacher used to cover the walls with pictures of the real world. They were probably the teacher’s holiday snaps anyhow.

WM1 : And children spend ages NOT learning. What about those detentions when you have to sit in silence or the class where you each read out a line of Hamlet. Going to Stratford and learning about the purge of Catholics would be more educational.

WM2 : They expect your child to do a lot of homework anyhow. The schools encourage learning outside of school and yet frown on a holiday. It is twisted logic and an abdication of responsibility.

WM1 : One official said that schools were sympathetic and helpful if you were ill, and teachers would help the child catch up.

WM2 :  And by extension, teachers won’t help if you broaden your world outlook with an educational holiday. “I don’t know my conjugations because I had flu last week” is fine. But “Sorry Miss, I was learning to ski so I missed your homework” is a crime.

WM1 : Asking headmasters to decide who gets to slap on the suntan lotion is too onerous. No wonder schools lock themselves in. When that thug of a dad turns up with a baseball bat because the head said “no” to a holiday, you can’t blame him. Maybe that’s why there’s legislation – to protect the headmasters.

WM2 :  Asking headmasters to exercise discretion is a curse. If you agree with the decision then the head is a hero, if you disagree – he’s a villain.

WM1 : So where are you jetting off to?

WM2 :  Disney, Paris – but we’ll pack a textbook.